Broken Hallejujah
by samwinchestergirl33
Summary: After the accident, Grace finds herself with a new lease on life. But at a cost. Two to three shot Spoilers for Degrassi Next Class, season two finale.
1. Chapter 1

**Broken Hallejujah**

 **Summary: After the accident, Grace finds herself with a new lease on life. But at a cost. Two to three shot Spoilers for Degrassi Next Class, season two finale.**

 **Part One**

Grace Cardinal bit her lip as her fingers traced the scars on her torso. They felt rough compared to the rest of her smooth skin and were red and healing. More than anything, however, they were a new lease on life. Because of her cystic fibrosis, she'd always assumed she would die. And when they were in the bus accident, she figured she'd die then. But by some miracle, she hadn't.

Someone had, though. And while her mother was ecstatic, Grace felt guilty. Guilt that she couldn't quite explain. Of course, she was thankful to be alive. She was only sad that another person had to lose their life for her to have this chance. The worst part is, her savior hadn't been some stranger. It had been someone she had went to school with. Someone so important to some of the people that she cared about.

The door to her hospital room opened and she saw Zoe standing there, dark hair pulled back in a messy ponytail, pretty face streaked with tears and mascara. She wore a pair of pink sweatpants and a baggy tee-shirt, hardly her normal attire. Still though, she managed to smile at Grace as she walked farther into the room, fingers pinching at her arm where she'd burnt herself.

"Hey." Zoe breathes, stepping toward the bed and reaching out a shaky hand to take Grace's, chipped nail polish standing out against Grace's pale skin. "Your mother said I could come in and see you."

Grace tries to smile as she looks at the girl, broken before her. She knows that Zoe had to struggle to come into this room. Not because she didn't care, but because of who she'd lost. "I'm glad you did." She answers, eyes traveling down to the burns healing and fading on Zoe's arms. "And I'm _really_ happy that you seem to be doing better."

The other girl gives a watery smile and her eyes glimmer with tears. "I am, too. I came out to Winston, you know? I haven't told my mom, yet. But Miles knows. And..." She tries to catch her breath as a lump gets caught in her throat. "And I hope that Tristan knows." Her eyes fixate on the scars she can see beneath Grace's thin hospital gown, watching the girl breathe.

The girl in question chews her lip, knowing what Zoe is thinking about. "Zo...I'm so sorry. I know you must miss Tristan. I wish he didn't have to die. It makes me feel guilty, knowing that he's the only reason I'm alive."

Zoe's hand squeezes Grace's and she gives Grace this look that makes he heart break even more. "Don't say that!" She admonishes. "God, of course I miss my best friend. I always will. I look and I expect to see him and I sometimes find myself trying to call him, but then I remember that I can't. But I don't blame you. At all. Tristan wouldn't have wanted you to blame yourself, either."

Grace stares at Zoe, feeling slightly grateful. She had missed her friend after the messy situation that had broke them apart. She was only sorry for the reason why they were interacting once more. "It feels weird, you know? I've always thought I was going to die so I never really let myself get close to people. I have no idea what to do now that I have all of these new possibilities."

Zoe smiles. "You live your life. You don't take for granted what Tristan gave you." She answers before standing up. "I've got to go. I promised I'd help Miles with the memorial service he's having at his house for Tristan."

Grace's eyes widen at the sound of his name and she can't help but ask, "How's he doing?"

Zoe's smile falls at that and the sad look replaces it once again. "He's really broken up about it. I think the only thing that is keeping him in check are Frankie, Hunter, and his mother. They make sure he eats right and doesn't relapse. I try to tell him that Tristan would want him to take care of himself. I think that helps, too. He really loves Tristan and I think he's angry because he was finally happy and then _this_ happens." She shakes her head. "It's really hard to believe."

Grace feels guilt settle into her stomach once again before she asks, " I know there's a memorial service tonight, but when is the funeral?" She questions, curiously.

Zoe seems startled by that question. "Should you really be planning on going? I mean...is that safe?" She wonders, worry upon her pretty face.

Grace rolls her eyes in annoyance. "That's what wheelchairs are for, dummy." She says affectionately before turning serious once more. "I just...I want to be there. I want to let Tristan and his family know that I am grateful for what he did."

Zoe chews her lip in thought before she replies, "The funeral will be at noon, two days from now at the church two miles from Degrassi." She answers.

* * *

After Zoe leaves, the nurse comes in with a bright smile and a tray of food. "Good morning, "Miss. Cardinal!" She chirps, bringing the tray over to the girl in the bed and placing it in front of her. "Your mother will be hear in a few moments. She's talking to Doctor Richards about what to do to make you comfortable when you leave the hospital."

Grace smiles at that as she begins to eat the scrambled eggs on her tray. "Thank you, Nurse Reece." She says sweetly.

Nurse Reece grins in reply. "I met your friend when I was coming in. She seems sweet."

The girl laughs at that, beaming. "Well, I don't think that _that's_ ever been said about her before." She jokes. "It was good seeing her, though. Hey, Nurse Reece? Do you think it would be possible for me to leave the hospital two days from now to attend a funeral?"

Nurse Reece stares at her with concern. "Whoever is the funeral for?"

Grace takes a deep breath before answering. "Zoe-the girl who you ran into-her best friend. And the person who gave me my new set of lungs."

The nurse's eyes widen in realization. "Well, you'll have to ask your mother if that's okay, darling. But I think it would be fine so long as you took precautions."

Grace smiles gratefully and promises herself that she'll ask her mother when she comes in, determined that she'll allow it.

 **To be continued: Memorial services, funerals, and run ins.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Broken Hallejujah**

 **Part Two**

Zoe Rivas sighs as she walks up the Hollingsworth's driveway. She carries an overnight bag in her hand to dress in Frankie's room for the memorial. She'd long since showered and dressed in a pair of jean shorts and a pink tank top, hair braided. Truthfully, she was rather dreading today. Her heart aches every time she thinks of her friend, of seeing Miles' heartbroken expression when they'd learnt that Tristan was brain dead. And Zig and Maya would be there to. As would Tristan's family.

Moments later, Frankie walks to her, sad look in her eyes. "How are you?" She asks, dark eyes wide and imploring.

Zoe leans in to hug the other girl briefly before she pulls away. "I'm okay. Still trying to process what's happened. How's your brother doing?"

Frankie shrugs desperately. "He's been keeping busy trying to make this memorial as perfect as possible. Hunter and I have been sleeping in his room with him. Last night, we woke up to him crouched on the floor, sobbing into a tee-shirt that Tristan had left here. I don't know how to help him. It doesn't seem fair that Tristan died while everyone else lived." She leads the way into the house and down the hallway, into the kitchen where Miles was pouring over trays of food.

Zoe feels her heart catch in her throat as she notes the dark circles under his eyes and how considerably pale he looks. When she happens to glance at his hands, she sees that they were shaking so hard he could barely pour the chips into the bowl. She reachs out to put a hand to his wrist, effectively stopping him.

"Hey, Zoe." He says, trying to smile though it didn't quite reach his eyes. "I didn't know you were here."

"Well no wonder!" She answers worriedly, eyes wide. "You don't look like you've slept at all! Miles, you've got to know that Tristan wouldn't want this!"

Miles laughs harshly, slamming the bowl so hard that it shattered and chips went flying. "Yeah, well. Tristan's not here anymore. He's dead. So forgive me if I don't feel like sleeping because every single time that I _do_ I imagine how horrifying that bus crach must've been. I remember his last breath when his parents pulled the plug because he was brain dead. I dream about when I'll have to see him in a coffin and watch all of my hopes and dreams be buried with him." When he stopped speaking, he was breathing heavily, flush to his cheeks and tears shining in his eyes.

Zoe didn't say anything as she moves forward to hug him, resting her head on his chest as she softly whispered, "I miss him, too."

* * *

Grace looks up when she hears the door open to her hospital room and she smiles when she sees Zig, Maya, and Tiny pour into the room. They look fine except for the few they'd each sustained, Zig's broken leg, and Tiny's sprained hand.

"Hey, Grace." Maya says, the first to move toward her. She hugs Grace a little too tightly and presses a kiss to her cheek as she swipes subtly at the tears falling from her eyes.

Grace hugs her back, gently rubbing the blonde's back comfortingly. She meets Zig and Tiny's eyes and sees the relief yet sadness in their gazes.

Maya pulls away, sniffling and looks at her. "I'm sorry for crying. I'm so glad you're okay. I just..." She trails off, not exactly knowing what to say. Of course, she's happy that her best friend is okay. That her best friend has a new lease on life. She truly deserves it. But then, she thinks of what will happen later tonight when she goes to Tristan's memorial service. She's not quite ready for that. Though they'd never quite gotten back their friendship after all that happened between them, she still cared for him and she regretted that they'd never get to make up the way that they should've.

"So, how's the hospital food?" Tiny asks, grinning at her boyishly as he helps steer the conversation in a different direction.

Grace smiles at him gratefully before replying, "Tasteless, as always." She rolls her eyes before continuing. "But don't worry, I'm used to it."

Zig smirks, resting against the doorframe with his hand behind his back. "Really?" He drawls. "Well, that's too bad. I guess we'll have to eat this by ourselves." He brings the bag from the local Chinese restaurant into eyeshot and watches as Grace's eyes practically bulge out of her head.

"Zig, so help me God, you better give me my food!" She growls playfully, reaching out to take the food from him as he laughs brightly.

"Do you know when you're getting out of here?" Maya questions curiously, watching her friend eat.

Grace shrugs. "I'll be able to get out for a few hours to attend Tristan's funeral a couple of days from now. But I have to take precautions and come right back afterward. I think I'll probably be out by the end of this week. Why do you ask?"

Tiny's brows furrow worriedly as he stares at his friend, "Are you sure that's a good idea?" He asks. "Won't going there upset you?"

She flips her black hair back and eats some lemon chicken. "I think I owe it to Tristan and his family to let them know how grateful I am for what he did. How it makes me feel doesn't really matter."

* * *

Zoe's hands shake as she quickly throws on the blue dress she'd brought with her and a pair of heeled sandals. She'd already braided her hair and put on some light makeup, so she had nothing else to do. She was truly just hesitating. Her gaze trails to the picture on Frankie's dresser that must've been taken at some point when Tristan and Miles had gotten back together. Smiling, she picks it up and stares at Tristan's bright face staring back at her, arm wrapped around Miles' shoulder. Miles, who looked at Tristan so adoringly. She's so busy taking it in that she doesn't feel Frankie step up beside her.

"I have this picture because I've never seen my brother look so happy before." Frankie says softly, smiling at the photo as well. "I might not have known Tristan as well as you or my brother, but I loved him for how happy he made Miles." She sighs before reaching for Zoe's hand. "Come on. We better get on out there to help my brother's greet people."

They meet up with Hunter in the hallway who's holding Yael's hand while looking extremely uncomfortable, wearing a bright blue tee-shirt with his black shorts. "I decided I should wear this instead of black like I usually do." He explains vaguely.

Zoe and Frankie nod in understanding, getting that this was Hunter trying to be there for his brother in one small way.

When they walk outside, the pool is illuminated by bright blue and pink fairy lights, picture of Tristan standing tall on the balcony, looking out over everyone. Tables are filled with food and drinks while another small table has colorful candles to light up later.

Zoe swallows because it's heartbreaking in this sad sort of way. She feels Hunter and Frankie leave her side to go to see their brother, leaving she and Yael to stare at the pool silently.

Slowly, a knock on the gate sounds before it opens and Winston steps inside. Zoe lets out the breath she'd been holding as he steps forward to pull her into a hug and she clings to him, fingers digging into his shoulders as she does so.

Over his shoulder, she sees Maya, Zig, and Tiny step forward cautiously, looking around before the three take their seats cautiously. She swallows and figures she'll go over to see them later.

The memorial is beautiful. She listens as Miles speaks of Tristan before they light their candles and let go of the balloons that had been bought for this exact moment.

She feels Maya step toward her carefully. Feels the blonde studying her before she finally asks, "What is it?"

Maya struggles to find an answer before she says. "I'm sorry for Tristan. I know how much you cared for him."

Zoe turns to face the girl, smiling sadly. "I'm sorry, too. I know you cared for him, even though you weren't so close. Which...had a lot to do with me, I guess."

The two girls sat in silence for a few moments before Maya asked, "Zoe...what exactly happened between you and Grace? I wouldn't ask...but I saw how you panicked when you saw Grace on the ground. And Grace would never explain why you two stopped talking. But I saw the card, teddy bear, and flowers you sent her. She mentioned that you'd been there, so you must've made up."

Zoe's breath catches in her throat as she wonders how to answer the question. It's not that she's ashamed of her sexuality. She's a lesbian and she's felt freer since admitting it to herself. However, answering that question, answering why she was so upset at Grace, what led to her sleeping with Zig could very well lead to destroying Maya and Grace's friendship and Zoe didn't want that. "We just had a stupid fight is all. It wasn't about anything serious. I just...I got upset for no reason." She winces at how easily the lie slips from her lips but hopes that will stop Maya from continuing to question things.

"Okay." Maya answers suspiciously, studying her carefully. "I should go say goodbye to Miles. I promised my mom I'd be back soon."

The other girl breathes out a sigh of relief before looking up at the sky to whisper, "I really need you right about now, Tristan."

 **Next Chapter: funerals and breakdowns**


End file.
